Making Habits Stick

Picking up a new habit, or ending an old one, can be difficult and frustrating. We might think that we're lazy or that it's not possible to change, but understanding why our brains resist change can help us recognize methods of habit formation that work for us.

Habits work through a cue, which tells your brain that it's time to act a certain way, a routine, which is the behavior that you exhibit, and a reward, or the positive outcome of doing the behavior.

For example, a cue might be that you smell your cat pooped in its litterbox. The routine would then be that you scoop the litter, and the reward would be the satisfaction of being a diligent pet owner (and the smell going away).

The more you follow the routine after the cue, the more your brain gets used to following this pathway and the easier it becomes to do it. Eventually, you won't even hesitate to get up and scoop the litter when you smell cat poop.

Another example of this could be if you want to stop eating candy. Every time you feel like eating candy (cue), you chew some gum instead (behavior), which provides you with the reward (the flavor of the gum and pride with not eating candy). Eventually, it'll become easier and easier to choose the gum over the candy.

Here are some other tips for creating or breaking habits:

• Take your time. Habits aren't created in one day. If you revert to your old behavior, that's okay! Consider the next day a fresh start.

• Make it realistic. You know yourself best and what a realistic baby step looks like for you! Start small, and build off of this success.

• Make it easy. Give yourself the tools to succeed! Get a bulk pack of gum if you want to stop eating candy. Keep your toothbrush next to your bed if you want to start brushing your teeth at night.

• Get support: Ask your friends or family to help you meet your goals. Maybe they keep your candy for you, maybe they help you with your reward. Even simple texts of encouragement can be rewards that keep us going!

• Make the reward desirable: You can create your own reward! Maybe each time you chew gum instead of eating candy, you give yourself a sticker. Maybe every time you brush your teeth before bed, you listen to your favorite song.

No matter what your goals are, understanding how your brain responds to habit building can help you be more compassionate as you work towards growth. Remember that the more you exhibit the behavior, the easier it'll become, and work with your brain to form your new habits!