STOP: A DBT Skill for Emotion Regulation

In our blog post on Intro to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), we discussed four main modules:

1. Mindfulness

2. Distress tolerance

3. Interpersonal effectiveness

4. Emotion Regulation

STOP is one emotion regulation skill that you can practice to, well, stop. You can use STOP during those times when it feels like you can't slow down, when your impulses take over, or when you feel like you might say something you don't actually mean.

Here's what STOP stands for:

• Stop

  • Literally. Stop talking, stop moving, and stay still.

• Take a step back

  • Physically and/or mentally. Put your phone down, go to a different room, take a few deep breaths, or engage with whatever grounding or regulating exercise is in your toolkit.

• Observe.

  • Check in with yourself: your thoughts, your bodily sensations, your emotions, the situation, and more. Consider what the facts of the situation are versus your perception of what's going on. Practice engaging with this step nonjudgmentally.

• Proceed mindfully.

  • With a regulated mind and body, consider how to move forward constructively. Let your wise mind take the driver's seat.

STOP helps us take action intentionally. It helps us practice impulse control and emotion regulation to move forward in ways that validate ourselves and recognize the impacts of our actions. If you often find yourself regretting actions you've taken or wishing that you could slow down, see if you can practice STOP during moments of frustration or high intensity.